One in seven Americans in serious relationships said their partner doesn’t do enough to show that they desire them, according to new research.
A survey of 2,000 sexually active U.S. adults in committed relationships found that nearly 100% of respondents said that they believe it’s important to show your partner that you love them (97%) and want to be intimate with them (96%).
However, nearly one in five people admit that being physically intimate with their partner has been a low or non-existent priority over the past year (18%).
The survey conducted by OnePoll for K-Y’s launch of theK-Y Desire Darkroomexperience found that consequently, a quarter of those surveyed don’t think that they spend enough time being intimate with their partner.
And these feelings don’t always go away with time: 29% of respondents, who have been with their partner for at least five years, think they could use more intimacy in their relationship.
What’s the hold-back? On average, respondents said that the stress of life has a negative impact on their relationship three days a week.
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Thirty-five percent are affected even more often, citing that life’s stressors get in the way most of the week.
To address this, a majority of those surveyed said spending time being intimate with their partner is a high priority in 2024 (55%).
“Keeping the spark alive in a relationship is rooted in showing that ‘I want you’ is just as powerful as saying ‘I love you,’” said Mariia Tarakanova, marketing director for intimatewellness at Reckitt. “Despite hectic schedules and life getting in the way, couples need to show their desire for each other.”
For the past year, saying “I love you” (51%), being positive to one another (50%), and spending more time together (46%) have been the top priorities for respondents. However, this year, goals look a bit different.
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In 2024, some of the top relationship goals are being positive with one another (37%), improving communication (34%) and being physically intimate more regularly (29%).
Currently, just 28% of respondents in serious relationships are intimate with their partner at least once a day.
Results showed that those who have been in a relationship for under five years are more likely to be intimate with their partner daily (39%) compared to those who have been in a relationship for over five years (23%).
This may be because respondents feel some aspects of their relationship are repetitive and could use a refresh, especially when it comes to the activities they do together (26%) and their time in the bedroom (23%).
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Even those who have been together for a long time aren’t exempt, with 23% saying they’re a bit bored in the bedroom.
Compared to the beginning of their relationship, 55% of respondents and their partners incorporate more new elements in the bedroom today, like personal lubricant.
But one in seven struggles with finding new ways to show their partner that they desire them in an intimate way.
With Valentine’s Day typically being the catalyst for romance, 65% of couples who spend the holiday together shared that they wish they were just as intimate year-round.
To mimic this, respondents would enjoy having their partner arrange dinner together at a favorite restaurant (53%), a romantic setting in the bedroom (47%) or a couple’s spa day (32%).
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To get creative, respondents recall feeling wanted when their partner “surprised me with a new wedding ring,” “leave me sweet notes,” “get me roses just because” and even got a little risqué when they “send me naughty pictures.”
These moments may be just what couples need to reignite the flame, as 68% already find their partner more desirable today than when they first met.
Similarly, 63% feel stronger passion for their partner today than when first meeting them, with men more likely to feel this way than women (73% vs. 55%).
“As evident through this study, we know the passion and desire is there and only grows throughout their relationships,” said Tarakanova. “This year, we’re encouraging couples to make time for these small intimate moments to show each other their “want” instead of assuming their partner knows.”
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RELATIONSHIP GOALS FOR 2024
1. Be positive to one another — 37%
2. Improve communication — 34%
3. Spend more time together — 34%
4. Say “I love you” more — 34%
5. Plan for the future — 31%
6. Learn/grow together — 30%
7. Be intimate more regularly — 29%
8. Build trust — 28%
9. Focus on new adventures — 27%
10. Find new ways to be intimate — 26%
